WHERE ARE YOUR MANNERS?
I live in a house full of boys. Teaching manners seems to be an ongoing lesson in my home. I asked myself this morning if Jesus ever taught on manners. What I found is interesting. But first, let me share with you what the dictionary and thesaurus have to say about the subject. Manner means a way of acting or behaving or how something is done; manners (plural) is socially correct behavior or polite standards.
There are not any direct references to the plural use of this word manner. However, there are several that use the singular form of the word. When King David wanted to build a house for the Ark of the Covenant, God responded by stating that He had ordained for King David's house to have a strong dynasty and that one of his children would build it. King David responded by asking, "Who am I, O Lord God? And what is my house, that You have brought me this far? And yet this was a small thing in Your sight, O Lord God; and You have also spoken of your servant's house for a great while to come. Is this the manner of man, O Lord God" (2 Samual 7:18-19)? In other words, is this how you deal with everyone?
Paul gave specific instructions to the church on how to receive communion with these words: "Therefore whoever eats this bread or drinks this cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of the body and blood of the Lord" (I Corinthians 11:27). In another place he spoke of repentance, saying, "For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death. For observe this very thing, that you sorrowed in a godly manner..." (2 Corinthian 7:10-11). The Bible also speaks of "not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some..." (Hebrews 10:25) and looking for the coming day of Jesus: "Therefore, since all these things will be dissolved, what manner of persons ought you to be in holy conduct and godliness" (2 Peter 3:11). And in a final example, John commended Gaius for his hospitality, saying, "Beloved, you do faithfully whatever you do for the brethren and for strangers, who have borne witness of your love before the church. If you send them forward on their journey in a manner worthy of God, you will do well" (3 John 5-6).
Combined, these references draw our attention to how we deal with others and God and how He deals with us. I am blessed to come from a family that taught morals and manners. I did not receive Jesus as my Lord until I was 21 years old, but manners (and the manner in which we deal with people) is a universal protocol, Christian or non-Christian. I learned to say please and thank you all the time, not just sometimes. I was taught to say excuse me if I was even potentially inconveniencing someone or had a slip of bodily function! I was instructed to put my napkin in my lap and keep my elbows off the table. I said "Yes, sir" and "No, Sir" - "Yes, maam" and "No, maam" or I got a thump on the head. Manners were expected and there was no excuse for not having any.
Nowadays, manners are treated as a past generation behavior and have lost all priority. In fact, it is more common to find people laughing at the lack of manners then it is to find someone who observes them. But these things should not be so. If we are representatives of Jesus Christ and children of God, shouldn't we behave as He does? "Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God" (1 John 3:1a)! What manner of love has He shown us? Let me tell you!
God's manner (and what ours should be) is laid out clearly in the scriptures. "Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God's love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]. It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]" (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, Amplified).
What conviction! Most likely, all of us need to re-evaluate our lives and make adjustments. This is just a small glimpse of what God expects of us and the MANNER in which we should behave with Him and with others. And did you notice that the Word says this behavior should never fail, never fade out, become obsolete, or come to an end? Manners are not a past generation behavior. Manners are behavior of the GODLY. We need to respect them, walk in them, teach them to our children, and find no cause to laugh at a lack of manners in someone's life. I don't think God finds it near as funny as the devil who has forever found ways to pervert the ways of God. May we all brush up on our manners and the manner in which we deal with others.
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